Guys, I’m struggling my methods are failing miserable when it comes to restoring my confidence. I’ve been feeling down, and fixating on my appearance, picking out flaws and comparing myself is exceeding its time frame. Desperately, searching within myself to find the root of my lack of self-confidence. Was it because of the knockdowns I’ve had lately? Is my ego bruised from having a couple of guys disappearing from my life? have I escaped my Cocoon of self-environment, and delve into the social world comparing myself to stunning women that have their shit together?.
I’m quite aware of the curated world that is social media, with people showing the glimpse of their world that seem to be fabulous and full of exciting new adventures. But, I can’t help feeling sad when I see people hitting the milestone I want to get to, seeing the beautiful holidays with their partners, people bragging about their earnings, and their new jobs. As happy as I am for these individuals, it’s created a bed filled with self-pity as I bask in the glories of my standstill life. I just don’t feel great about myself.
Even though it’s relatively bad doing the comparison game, it’s normal human behaviour to judge our progress or success in life by seeing how we match up to our peers, and social media has made it easy to gain a slight glimpse into people’s lives. I mean, it’s silly right? Feeling blue and insecure, not keeping up with everyone, even though we know it’s a perfectly crafted representation of lives. We don’t see the struggle they went through before securing the job, the hard work that went into getting the milestone, the anxiety of having a newborn, or the argument that went on behind the scene of the holiday. Somehow writing this post is making me feel better, and my grateful attitude is slowing creeping back into my life, reassuring myself that it’s all just a jealous phase, and I need to work on it.
I’m sure I’m not the only one going through this experience, feeling inadequate and throwing myself a social media-induced pity party. God didn’t create all humans same, we all have our flaws, gift and journey. We can never be that person, and that person can’t be us. Beautifully imperfect humans, with strengths that we should continue to harness. We should, including myself, need to continue to remember nothing is as perfect as it seems. I know I’m not going to wake up one morning, and have a high self-esteem that is unshaken, I’m a working progress. I have my good days and also the bad. I need to be kinder, and patient with myself.