Many women are obsessed with projecting the laid-back image to a guy despite having issues and wanting to express themselves. They fear that asking questions, knowing what they want and demanding answers would appear as being high maintenance which will scare the guy off. Thus neglecting their needs and wants, and putting the guy’s priority above theirs.
For centuries, women are taught to strive and achieve perfection in every aspect of our lives. Our body has to be healthy, slim and curvy, makeup should be flawless, yet natural, our hair in perfect condition, and we have to be extremely well-dressed. So, why can’t we expect perfection when it comes to dating? Due to the scrutiny of having high standards when it comes to men, I capitulate to the pressure by projecting the laid-back, easy-going, low maintenance aura to guys.
Throughout that period, I didn’t go on a real date, and painfully avoided the topics about our future like a plague, trapping me in an unhappy place for a long time. Although I was battling with self-esteem, and abandonment issues, I didn’t want to lose the men in my life, at that point, so pleasing them by keeping mute on my feeling was the way forward. Eventually, those situation ships fizzled out, and I was the one left heartbroken.
And the problem with having a low-maintenance mentality will result in being taken for granted. The important aspect of being high maintenance is that it will weed out the guys that don’t actually like you or refuse to step up to meet your standards. Despite my misfortune with guys, I’ve met some guys that liked the fact that I was high maintenance. I have standards, I know what I want, and need from life, and in a spouse, and they were happy to oblige. Even though we didn’t work out, they expressed that they couldn’t give me what I needed, and felt it was unfair to string me along, hence the reasons we broke up. But I’ll always cherish the romantic experience I’ve had with each of them.
There’s also a notion that high maintenance women are gold diggers, when in fact, they are goal diggers, striving for a better life, exuding confidence and looking good while doing it. We don’t believe in mediocrity in everything we do and want the best of everything. Contrary to popular belief, high maintenance girls can go out without makeup because they have good skin and strive to maintain their skin condition, as skin care is a top priority. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a life plan, wanting a successful life with a guy who’s dreams, and goals align with yours. In life, when a guy likes, and want a relationship with you, he will do whatever it takes to make it a reality. I may not have a lot of guys knocking on my door, but the guys I do date after accepting, and letting my high maintenance personality shine through, understand my higher expectation in the relationship.