The older I get, I can see the bizarre reality of the dating world. The progress and steps continuously change, with endless rules and regulation to abide by, making matters worse as it’s been infiltrated by men that conveniently forget they have wives or girlfriends.
I’m not sure if the ideals portrayed in films, and seventies are still causing this naviete thinking of meeting a well-dressed single gentleman that would ask a lady out on a date in the cutest way possible. He pulls up to her front door in the evening, steps out of his car, and approaches her front door, walk her to the passenger side of the car, and opens the door for her. The newly acquainted pair head to an elegant restaurant with a table reserved, they eat, talk and learn about the backgrounds and interests of the other. After the dinner, the gentleman drives the lady home, accompany her to her door, probably share the first kiss and leave. But, the more I date this concept feels foreign and unrealistic.
Instead, in the 21st century, asking if a guy has a girlfriend, wife, baby mother, or all of the above is the new normal. Nowadays, I find myself doing rigorous background checks, intense interrogations, video calling at random times in the evening to verify their single status. Most men just can’t be trusted. Today, solidified the notion that men are liars and cheaters, with the constant harassment that has been imposed by married and taken men. If they aren’t slipping me their number after completing a transaction, they project a flirty behaviour when their partners aren’t watching. Le sigh.
This impact led to analysing my body language, and the aura I exude that seem to attract unavailable men. Why am I so unfortunate when it comes to dating? I’m a lovely girl, that’s career focused, driven who’d like to have it all. I want to be a mother, successful career woman, and a devoted wife, not someone’s maybe, or the woman on the side. Regardless, I don’t want to give up hope that good men exist and succumb to being a woman who turns a blind eye to her husband’s infidelity or allows cheat cards.
I’m in nowhere to give marriage advice as I haven’t had that experience but, please focus on your marriage and leave singles alone. You’ve found the love of your life, let us find ours.